How Jealousy Can Heal You

February 03, 2022

How Jealousy Can Heal You

I have so many ideas and so many things I want to create that on days like this, I wonder how it’s all going to get done. I have a new mentor who’s 75 years old, has written over 250 books, taught thousands of students, and has many more projects in the works.

In her own words, she “can’t die because there’s too much to do!” Hearing about how much she creates and completes (so key), is incredibly inspiring to me now. But there was definitely a period in my life where I would have reacted much differently.

I used to be one of those folks who’d look at others and be quietly jealous of their accomplishments. I wouldn’t wonder why they had it, I’d wonder why I didn’t. We can all relate to that very uncomfortable feeling. I wasn’t a hater, in the sense of thinking people didn’t deserve what they had or putting other folks down because “they made it.”

In sitting with the discomfort within myself, I learned that envy is an accurate indicator of what you want in your life.

Envy helped me recognize what I wanted to do and it made me acknowledge the fears that were my excuses for not going after it. As is the case with all of us, I was getting in my way.

I started to use jealousy as a motivator. When I saw something in another person that triggered that all too familiar feeling, I went inward and figured out what was the energy in their lives that I wanted in mine. Then I’d put my head down and got to work.

Once I was focused on my mission and clear about my goals, the jealousy went away because I was actively working toward fulfilling my own desires.

Jealousy triggers us the most when we aren’t taking the steps we need to take in order to receive what we’ve been asking for in our prayers. But once we get clear, focused, and we’re following our instructions from Spirit, honestly, we get too enthusiastic about what’s unfolding on our paths to be overly concerned about what’s happening on someone else’s.

This is when you can look up and root for other people from a place of true joy. You don’t want what they have…you’re excited about what’s yours.

I’m a firm believer that any vision that comes to you means it’s a “yes” from the universe. Some ideas come and we decide to pass them on, knowing they're meant for another, but the ones that hit the heart and ignite our inner fire, those are your winners. And contained within the vision is the promise - it’s already done.

There’s a future you that has that thing already. You’re already healed and the healer you see yourself being. You’re already the author, the professor, the world traveler, the artist, parent, speaker, ___________.

Your only work, which is big work because it requires consistency, is to close the gap between the now you and the future you. And you don’t need to know steps A through Z right now. You only need to take today’s next right step, then tomorrow’s, then the next day’s.

Often when I would feel stuck, like I didn’t know what I was supposed to focus on, I’d meditate and ask: what would future Selima do? Without fail, I’d get a nudge toward something and I’d go do that. It didn’t always make sense in the moment, but looking back I’m so thankful I was obedient and trusted the process. Try it…you can trust your future you.

With love,

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